Did we lose our kindness to COVID?

Liberal MP Joël Lightbound claims his own government’s response to the pandemic has been “politicized” and “divisive.” He’s got a point.

While Justin Trudeau may have been right to say many Canadians are “angry” and “frustrated” with the unvaccinated, stoking that anger is hardly productive or responsible for any leader.

But it’s not only the Liberals who should be reassessing their attitudes. Republicans versus Democrats, Liberals versus Conservatives, the vaccinated versus the unvaccinated — as the divides grow wider, what are we each doing to build better bridges rather than demonize one another?

I am not alone when I say that. In my own extended family, the vaccinated and unvaccinated are becoming estranged. The rage of extreme viewpoints astounds me, given the love and respect that earlier defined these relationships. Reports of destroyed friendships and family connections around issues of the jab are increasing.

And I watch with concern how aggressive Facebook posts from my own acquaintances belittle or berate those who do not hold their views on the importance of vaccines. The mocking seems relentless. Last year, UN Secretary General António Guterres warned that the pandemic was unleashing “a tsunami of hate and xenophobia, scapegoating, and scaremongering.” The situation does not seem to be much improved.

We need to stop and see where we are going with such attitudes. In my view, we are not headed to a good place.

While respectful dialogue on divergent issues is always welcome within a democracy, it is concerning and ultimately defeating to engage in such deeply divisive conflicts. As biologists know, evolution has proceeded on the strength of collaboration and co-operation. Duke University professors Brian Hare and Vanessa Wood confirm that rather than relying on survival of the fittest, human progress has developed primarily on the strength of “survival of the friendliest.” Others agree we are “group animals” and our progress demands we focus on ways to understand and mediate, rather than condemn one another.

Recently, CBC Manitoba published a series around acts of kindness in the community that had been reported during the pandemic. It was refreshing to read about such random acts — from delivering letters and gift cards to nurses to clearing neighbours’ snowy driveways.

But these actions are not enough. We need to start to question the deepest values that drive decisions and policymaking. Anger, divisiveness, conflict and stubborn entrenchment in one’s own views do not open the door to listening, understanding and reaching an equitable resolution.

As we look to our elected officials for guidance during these troubling times, we should realize the whole point of public health is to broaden the dialogue to include social, community, economic and environmental concerns —– and that means inviting multiple stories. Different voices and judgment calls will emerge around issues of risk, for instance.

The challenge is to ensure we remain open-minded and tolerant even as divergent views emerge. In the case of COVID-19, the fact is that it is more than just a virus, as crucial as it is to get it under control. The pandemic affects our mental, social, economic and environmental well-being as well. A genuinely holistic public health perspective acknowledges this complexity, and demands we are humble, open-minded and tolerant towards one another and willing to genuinely listen to different viewpoints. This is how we can best hope to start to “live with the virus,” as so many people recommend.

As we start to move out of the pandemic, let’s certainly try to leave the divisiveness behind. It is not only a job for political leaders to do so, but the same applies to each of us. There are many different stories to tell, and plural perspectives, whether they are told from left- or right-wing or moderate political standpoints. Only if those narratives are respectful will we continue to acknowledge the roots of democracy and of our humanity.

MP Lightbound is right to say “it’s time to stop dividing Canadians and pitting one part of the population against the other.” His colleague Nate Erskine-Smith is also right that “we need to manage our differences with respect.” We need to remember that if there is respect and kindness toward one another, we can always achieve more together than separately.

Ingrid Leman Stefanovic, PhD, is a former dean of the faculty of environment at Simon Fraser University and professor emerita in the department of philosophy at the University of Toronto.

She is currently writing a book for the University of Toronto Press entitled A Kinder World.